Why not?

I like to picture us as one of those annoying couples that everyone is jealous of because we're so much alike. Because we're so in sync with one another. We would never spell it out "in sync" though, choosing instead to refer to our relationship as N'Sync, because, well, why not? We'd be adorable together, bickering over a ridiculous celebrity news story, fighting over which late night show to watch (while really we'd both be paying no mind to the TV, instead reading some insightful novels recommended by John Green), and arguing over which of our favorite chinese restaurants to go for dinner. I feel like we'd have our own YouTube channel but would never actually upload anything to it. We'd make tons of random videos but never feel they were good enough for the inter-webs, deciding instead to strictly share them with close friends at get-togethers. We'd be completely amazed by one another still, after 6 years of ups and downs, our friendship would be the world to the other. We'd be in love still of course. We'd look back on High School and appreciate it as the life that gave us one another, but not much else. We'd be we, which is all we would need.

I wouldn't be writing this of course, because there would be no need to look back on life and picture how it could be different. I wouldn't want it to be different. I would have you and that's all I'd need. But I wouldn't be me. I'd be someone else at this point in my life. You'd be someone else at this point in your life.

Instead, we're both two separate people, two people independent of one another. We aren't a we, an us, a them. I'm me. When I think of it, you're really a stranger to me. I don't know the person you've become just like you don't know the person I've become. I can theorize all I want about what could have been, what might have been, what should have been, but in the end there's no use but the hilarity of it all.

Looking back is interesting... Looking forward is hard... Making up my own story of everything along the way, that's just silly, but why not?

Issues

It's good having those few people who you can tell anything. You, abyss of the internet, are one of those people. When I used to literally write in a journal I loved the ability to say anything I wanted without consequence and here I think I can do the same. We'll see how this goes...

Over the past few days I've realized I have issues. I have this inability to harvest emotions like normal people do. I also have this inability to get over things. Things being when I have feelings for a person and never really have the chance to get over them because I spend every single day with them. Things also being that when reunited with said person feelings come back when I've tried pretty hard to get over said feelings. Those things annoy me. That's why I have issues.

I don't know what it is. Maybe it's because I had these feelings during the biggest change in my life. Maybe it's because I haven't found someone new. Maybe it's because I can't help it. Maybe it's because I'm really meant to be with this person. I'll try not to think about that last maybe, because if that were the case then things would be a lot easier, right? Yeah, that last maybe should be discarded. The sheer fact that I've noted it is cause for concern. Gosh I have issues.

Nice Day

The sun was shining most of today and although I didn't set aside time to enjoy the nice weather, I do thank it for bringing along a nice day. It was a relief not having to dodge raindrops on my way in and out of my car, as I've grown accustomed to. Thanks climate change for bringing Jersey all this rain in June!

I woke up later than I wanted to this morning... well, this afternoon... but I still accomplished most of what I needed to get done. Father's Day gift (check), clean my room (check), do laundry (check), get my little sister's birthday present (che... well not really..). Today consisted on sleeping late, going to the mall, and enjoying a delicious dinner. All three of which are things I love to do (and might I say, do very well)!

Top three reasons today was awesome:
*drum roll*

1. So although I meant to buy this coloring book for my 5 year old sister's birthday which is this weekend, it turns out it has much more potential. Basically, I'm keeping it all for myself. Some people say "it's like stealing candy from a baby." But to me "it's like stealing creative supplies from a child." This awesome coloring book joins the list of countless crayons, markers, and gel pens I've borrowed from my younger siblings. However, I did buy this myself and never actually gave it to her... so I feel it's fine.



2. Found this dress at Rue 21 for $20! It was love at first sight and I just had to had to have it! I know it cost a lot more than it's probably worth... but I don't care. There are just certain things one needs in life... and I needed this dress!!!








3. When I got home from the mall my parents had already eaten dinner. But my stepdad had thought of me and, knowing I wouldn't be home, picked up my favorite treat from a local pizzaria. It's called a rice ball. But it's not just a normal rice ball. It's filled with meat and veggies and sauce and deliciousness!!!!! Needless to say, I enjoyed it very much as my dinner!

Peace, Love, Potter

Kristina

Love Love Love

Had a VERY long day today.
This late at night I'm not finding much happy. After waking up at 6am I helped run a summer orientation day at my University and didn't get home until the afternoon. More on that in a future post. Basically, I'm beat! Not that today wasn't rewarding, I do love being an Orientation Leader and helping new students get to know my school, but today was just... very long (as previously stated, i know, I'm short on originality tonight).

After I got home and ate dinner (and took a major power nap) I stopped over Heather's house for a few hours to watch a movie which was good times. We watched 50 First Dates which made me simultaneously disgruntled and happy. Happy because it's a funny movie that is really heart warming, classic romantic comedy, but disgruntled because, let's face it, I'm running on empty when it comes to a love life. I know that I can survive without a romantic interest, and I know I'm a strong independent woman and yadda yadda yadda... but sometimes I just think it would make me feel more complete to have a significant other. Movies like that always make me think about how alone I do feel sometimes. But then, when I think about it more, I know that at some point in my life I will get what I want. Right now I have no prospects, but things are always changing... for the better.

I'm trying to stay optimistic here!

Things

So the whole title of this blog dealio was supposed to be meaningful and what not.

(I don't plan on this entry being at all coherent... more like streams of consciousness.... just a warning... please don't judge me, I'm really not stupid!).

Anyway as I was saying... my blog title. To me it means there is always something brighter just around the corner. Something hidden behind all the crap that life throws at you. Something good just waiting to be found. In my life, and in the writings of this blog, I'm searching for that happiness. A lot of my journal entries talk about how depressed I am about something or how annoyed, unhappy, etc etc, that I am. I realized that I need a place to come to where I can document the good things in my life. All the little (and big) things that make me want to live my life. For example: If one day I have the most amazing tea at Starbucks, I may just come on here to let you all know ("you all" being no one right now since I have no subscribers... haha... but it's the internet so let's just say you all means the internet as a whole).

It's the small things in life that matter most. Those little moments that end up making your day. Here's to a swell summer where my happiness is just around the corner!

K